Filled with much thoughts.

Monday, December 31, 2007

Its a recap on 2007 so its going to be a super long post.
its good to write it down, don't you think? i will get to see it again a few years later when i suddenly think of it :)

It have been a year already, time really files.
2007, what a unpleasant year for me and my family.

grandma's death, financial problem, father's shop burnt in amk market fire, mentally ill auntie gone missing but found in the end, friends' death, parents health not very good, my health get worse and worse etc, making people angry, people makes me angry, people sad, i sad, people cry, i cry.
Sometimes, i really feel that my life is like a series of drama. Mishaps you often see on tv, happens to me.
BUT
It doesn't affects me alot. Yes, sometimes i feel so tired, But there's alway some kind of unseen strength that support me and my family through. Its like with the help of friends and other family memebers, things seems easier to pass through. I'll take it as a test that god had given us. And yes, we have become braver and stronger each time.
I once ask my mother. "How's daddy and you coping so far? How's daddy feeling right now about the shop being burnt? We have to start all over again right?"
She replied " Ok lor, your father is pretty sad about it. But he say nevermind, we can start over again but its going to be tough."
And she also said "It doesnt seems to bother us alot leh, haha. Maybe we are numb already. Start over again lor nevermind lah, you don't worry ok"
Yes, my father previous shop at seletar market escape the fire about 6 years ago. They have to realocate us to a new market. And business wasn't good for the first 2 years. Finally its showing some results and life are better, then the fire broke out at the amk market again. I think we have affinity with the fire, it seems to follow us everywhere. But, i think god have been very very kind to us. Every store in the market have suffer quite a big loss as their shop were either badly burnt or only a small amount of goods being retrieved back. My father went back there wanting to see his shop but the person don't let us in. They say inside very dangerous. Till the very last day before the market is fully pull down. my father recieve a call from the management. They ask him to go back and retrieve his good. with the thinking theres nothing much to take, he went back. To our surprise, the shop is like untouched by the fire. Theres shutter only pop out. The things inside were all nicely place there. Some where dirtied by the fireman water. Other than that, its good. Even the photos and the licence were not burnt. Maybe that's what people always saidm its a miracle or HAO REN YOU HAO BAO.

ok next...
I have alot of regrets.
Regret now will not help anyway. But there's something that bothers me till now.
One of the regrets that affect me most is not being able to bring my grandma back to my house before she passed away. She wanted to see my mentally ill auntie for the last time, a daughter that worrys her all her life. She wanted to come back to her home, a place where she 3/4 of her life at. My ah ma, A person whom i have lived with for 20 years. A person i love and still will. A elderly whom i respect the most. A model for me to learn from. Love her.

Another regret is, I failed as a friend.
I failed to maintain some of my friendship. I'm like always making things worst.
Making people angry.
Failed to do my best as a friend.
The more i wanted to savage the situation, the hopeless it seems to get.
what to do, jus 顺其自然吧.
because no matter what, 船到桥头自然直 :)

There are quite a number of happy moments though.
My life isn't that bad after all, haha.
I have met alot of great people. No matter from school, class, work.
All of you have given me lots of joy. Nice meeting you all :)
Not forgetting all my old friends. Thank so much for standing by me all these years. I really appreciate that. Love you all too :)

In this one short year, i think i've changed. Hope its for the better.
I've stepped into the 2 category, which means i've turned 20. No longer in the 10th category.
Although i am 20 years old but i still think that i am not mature enough, that pretty sad isn't. Old in same but didnt grow up in my thinking, jia you ar huishan.
And what the hell, i'll be turning 21 this year. OH MAN! i cant believe i grow so fast. I'll be a grown up soon, that's not a happy thing to celebrate you know. Don't understand why people like to celebrate 21st birthday. Thats when i will step into the society and face all kinds of challenge.
But, i will still celebrate la.
I wanted a cake in a shape of a key. Old fashioned right, nevermind lah, 我怀旧 ma. LOL.

Family. yes, i have a happy family.

Friends, yes love you all.

For studies, still as bad. Ya, dun wish to think about it.
I have done my best, its still like that. So ya, dun need to think.

as for love, it seems hopeless too.
I used to make a stupid wish when i am celebrating my 19th birthday.
hope to get attach before 21st. HAHA
very dumb right.
so now you know why i say i am not mature enough already. HAHA.
and wishes don't come true, i know. Just a silly wish i made.
Forget about it k. HAHA.
Yes, i know you all will say this kind of thing cannot rush one.
I KNOW.
I'm only jotting it now :D
wait till i slim down ar, i think queue until taxi stand there lor. HAHA!!!! ok, I"M JOKING.

hmm.. ok lah. i think i should stop already because i don't what to write already. Or is it i dun wish to recap all over again.
Like what i have said before, humans should look forward.

So just let 2007 ends here, I love you all.

2008, i welcome you will my big arms.
But please, be a better one this year okie. Love you too. HEHE.
:):):):)

3:11 AM

Sunday, December 30, 2007

i ate lots of calamaries yesterday and yes, i got rashes on my face and body.
good one.
so how am i going to countdown outside tmr?

10:23 AM

Saturday, December 29, 2007

What makes a person changed ?
Why does things and r/s changed over the years.
Why do the mindset of "I just want to be friends with you " had changed so drastically over the years.
Why years back the simple friendship had evolved into a profitable business thing.
Does everyone befriend everyone for a motive ?
Don't we find tiring ?

- quote from ppl's blog.

when shopping with my sister today. suppose to go out earlier but my aunties all come. drag until 6 plus then go out. my little cute cousin said" why i come back you all go out" with a sad but adorable face. oh, i heart her very much because she is cute and of course she remembers my name. haha. last time her mother brought her to our house, then go away for a while. she cry so loud and non stop. nobody know how to deal with her, then she always sticks with her mummy. dunno is i cut this hair abit cute like her or wad, she starts to interact with me. (ok, the previous part when i said i'm a little cute like her, yes i'm BULLSHITTING). ya so when i was about to go out, she shouted byebye and wave at me. AH, so cute!
we went to wisma first. go to dorothy perkins and found nothing nice so i bought a belt which only cause me 24.60 (yes, i just got my pay). then we went to top shop. i bought a blue top and my sister bought two. went fish and co for dinner. went bread talk to buy bread for my family. and we takeaway calamaries for my brother. went around to look for pumps but no vaild. not enough time to go other place, wasted. home sweet home. and ya, da gu cooked mee siam and it is delicious yum yum.

9:34 AM

Friday, December 28, 2007

Weird Al Yankovic - Like a surgeon

i think this song is "like a virgin" right?
lol, i don't know.

7:27 AM

you know what?
i am still nervous about it.
whenever i am staring at the screen, my hearts goes pom pom pom.
LOL.
silly girl.

and i say i wanna go malaysia for seafood.
till now still haven go.
I want to go someday!
maybe genting too.

1:41 AM

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

I miss my grandma very much.
Its has been exactly 8 months since she passed away.
Time files but it seems so yesterday.

I look at my father, he aged.
I look at my mother, more white hair.
I look at myself, still as heavy maybe heavier.
I look at my brother and sister, wondering why they don't look like me totally.

BUT

Its a blessing to have them around.

10:08 AM

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Merry Christmas To All!

had to work on christmas eve but my day wasn't wasted. Went over to shu's house to countdown with her sister and sis's boyfriend and her boyfriend. There's alot of ppl over at clark quey yesterday. All were either with their friends, family and loves one. Envy them, because i am alone waiting for the bus. HAHA. so went i reach her house, i have a bath first then after that sat down and eat the food that they have prepared. Soon, its going to be 12am. So we bring out the log cake and look at the time. yeah, its christmas. In jus five days time, it will be 2008. How fast it can be, don't you think so? This year don't feel like squeezing with the crowd so celebrate at home wasn't a bad choice either. We watched tv, eat tibits and soon we played games! The first game was Heart Attack. The loser will have to drink. Drink what, of course its vodka but its vodka citron. Not nice! I had one cup and my heart was like pumping and face get so red. LOL! We decided not to drink anymore as it really dun taste nice. haha. so we continue playing with no punishment. We get even higher. We were like screaming and laughing in the middle of the night. Hope the neighbour wont get irritated. After the game, we got so tired because of the intense laughing. We decided to play uhno stacko. HA! after a while, we get sick of it and we continue to watch movie on HBO. Tom cruise! haha. Went to sleep around 5am.

Later i'm going going to a friend's chalet at downtown east for bbq! thanks the parents for inviting. haha. And i'm meeting a group of friends at beach culture even later. Enjoy your holiday before the school starts!

Wishes don't come true so no point wishing anyway. LOL!

12:53 AM

Sunday, December 23, 2007

"Weird Al" Yankovic - White & Nerdy

i watch this and i am laughing my head off. hope i'm not outdated with this video.
Enjoy peeps!

10:08 AM

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Went to work on thurs, afternoon shift. went i am going to pull down my shutter then suddenly remember that i didnt bring the shop key, so forgetful of me. With no other choice, i called my father. Thankfully, he's at home. While waiting for my father to bring the key for me, i on some music and read a book in the shop. Hmm, quite a nice book. I wanted to borrow Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars from xiu but i forgot.

Friday, went out with kelly and huimin. Its huimin birthday. Happy birthday girl! Went town for movie. watched alvin and the chipmunks. Seriously, i think that movie is only average. I didnt laugh at some part when people laugh. So i only grade it 6 out of 10. Went off after movie. When central to meet shuhui, we look after millie shop for her. willie reach at 9 plus. We close the shop at 9.30 and he brought us to yishun dam. There are alot of cars and bike there. And ppl were either chatting or having pinic there. Heard that some even went there to bbq. HAHA! its a good place to chat, really. The breeze was good, the scenery was good(even though it was quite dark). Mostly importantly, there is different types of people to see. LOL! Celebrate shuhui birthday there. Glad that she like the small small cake. Had a $1 ice cream cone, yeah love it. Went to prata shop after that, wait so long for ppl to take our order and waited so long for the prata. In the end, we leave. Didnt want it anymore. From awake wait until sleepy. Home sweet home after that.

Actually i am thinking whether if you care. If not, that will be pretty sad.

5:11 AM

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

my cousins, they are so so so adorable!

HI to all. HAHA~!

time pass so slowly, everyday.

10:02 AM

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

My whole body is aching now, especially my leg. My butt hurts too!
Went cycling at east coast park today. Met my friends 11.30 at east coast and i woke up at 8.30 to prepare. And thank god, i wasn't late today. If not i will have to face "tong zi" black face. HAHA! Rented a bicycle at 12.30, we were given 1 hour free with every 1 hour rented, two free bottled water too. Too long never excercise already, awhile then i feel tired already. LOL!
There's rain in the morning but luckily when we reach the rain stopped and the sun came out. Very sorching sun indeed because i got sun burnt. Its ok because i will only become red and when my skin peel off, i will become fair again. We ride for about 1 and a half hour. Return the bike as its going to rain already. Bus to parkway parade for lunch. Home sweet home.
I think this is a very meaningful outing, we get to exercise and play at the same time but not jus movies or eating. Hope theres more outing in the future, CHEERS!

3:48 AM

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Your Horoscope for DECEMBER 16, 2007

The key word for you today is boundaries, Hui shan, so think for a minute about what this means to you. It is time to sit down with yourself and have a serious talk. Set some limits for yourself and be honest about where you should go about drawing the line. Your health, your state of mind, and your relationships with others all depend on your taking the initiative to know when to say no in certain situations.

i want to go JB for seafood!!

8:02 AM

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Went shopping for clothes at marina square today. Saw luo zhi xiang autograph session. Saw nothing in mind, all the clothes are like so winter. Went to millenium walk instead. We bought mix and match chocolate worth $11.40 at candy empire BECAUSE someone suddenly have the urge to eat chocolate. Bought munchy donuts but ended up don't feel like eating.

We bused to hougang central, a play ground to play swing. Waited for willie there as the three of us are going out later. Sit until my butt pain sia, old already haha. We leave around 10.15pm. Got a sudden urge to eat xiao long bao, so we went geylang there. But then its so pack today and we cant find a parking lot so we went ahjuni there. Had vegetarian popiah and "oyster egg omelatte". Its much more nicer than i expected. I wasn't very keen in the first place, but when i eat its surprising nice. Its actually like the normal one we eat, jus that the oyster is replace by mushroom. I think singapore is so so small. I show willie my father photo as we chat, then he let out a big laugh. He is actually my father "friend" at the fou tang. They know each other. LOL!

Car to pasir ris park after supper. Sat there listen to music chat awhile then leave for home already. I'm very tired now, have to work tml. Cant be late. So i'll be going to sleep now.

Good night!

FERRERO ROCHER IS STILL MY FAVOURITE!

10:08 AM

Friday, December 14, 2007

"sometimes its better for one not to expect too much, or perhaps dont expect, and in return, you get surprises instead." -Beatrice

The long awaited term break is here, so fast can. Everyday pass so fast till i feel that its only a few weeks. When there's no break, i want it badly. When there's one, I hate it.
But i am going to make this holiday a fruitful one. Do some projects, work and go out and enjoy life!
Christmas coming!
I'm working on the eve, still thinking whether i should count down outside anot.
I hate crowd, especially they use the white foam and spray it on you, totally piss me off. But if i am playing with my friends still okay. HA!
Santa claus is coming to town!

12:07 AM

Thursday, December 13, 2007

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

Huishan says:
LOL
Huishan says:
what la
Huishan says:
lol

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

You have just sent a nudge.

[]*KeLy*[] just sent you a nudge.

This is how best friend communicate in msn.
Its feels good when she knows what I mean when I don't say much.
Is that what we call Telepathy?
LOL

nudging is the new talk.

9:36 AM

Scenario 1
I just finish filming an "action movie", in my dream.

I dreamt of, when i am crossing a road. There was this 2 big and long double decker bus passing by.The bus bang into each other. Then this bus suddenly flip and turn towards me. The whole bus was swinging towards me but i miss me by merely about 1cm. Then there was another long and big bus also flipped and was like sliding towards me. In my dream, i remembered i use my own hand to move the bus away when its was about to hit my head.

The behind part i forgot already. But its definitely quite scary.

Scenario 2
I recieve a message this morning while i am sleeping, I read it. Then when i am awake already, I thought i dreamt of receiving a message this morning. To confirm, i check my phone. There was this sms from Yahoo! Mail

"Your Phone Number: 6596****** won $9500 in the Yahoo! 2007 Mail Alert Programme. Winners contact mailprize***@yahoo.com for FREE claims and delivery details."

HAHA! what a joke.
if money so easy to win, then some ppl dun need to work already.

4:26 AM

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

ERP test, gone.
Blame it on myself, not daring enough.
Bought a mouse, a 1 gb thumbdrive for $28.90
Cheap, but i think the mouse quality not very good. Never lah, can use can already.
Went hougang mall to meet kelly, she's accompanying me to do project. Thanks friend!
Ate black pepper chicken chop for dinner, we share a bacon carbonara. LOL!
we are starving!
Did our work at three venue. Hans, Library, Mac.
Wireless sucks.
Walk a big round to willie's block. Should have walk the other side of the mall.
I wanted to cut across the field, but its too wet and muddy.
Thought we will go and visit aunty, but too late and we are tired, shuhui they all not done yet, so going tml after work.
Got a ride home from willie, thanks ar brother.
Although paiseh to trouble him but at least i reach home faster.
Rest abit then continue my project.
My eye lid is closing soon, very soon.

very sian, i have to work on christmas eve and NY day.
ok bye.

7:49 AM

Monday, December 10, 2007

Marketing test, done.
School, ok.
Tmr ERP.
Meeting kelly.

BYE.

6:22 AM

Saturday, December 08, 2007

HELLO to my future,
GOODBYE to my past.

heh heh.

10:56 AM

Friday, December 07, 2007

Sometimes, i just wish that i can be smarter in every area. I felt like a complete loser, especially when its come to school works. I basically screw up my life, my test, everything. So god can you please grant me some wisdom and help me complete all my projects, please?!

The worst nightmare has yet to come, let's pray hard that i can survive it.
BYE!

9:18 AM

Thursday, December 06, 2007

End it, today.

2:23 AM

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

sometimes...
sometimes, I just expect more.
sometimes, I just can't control yr emotions.
sometimes, it can be really happy.
yet sometimes, it can be really sad.
sometimes, I don't know I even did that.
sometimes, when I did, I didn't realise it at all.
sometimes, I thought I can, but I can't.
sometimes, I can be very soft hearted.
yet sometimes, I can be very very strong headed like a bull.
sometimes, its minor.
sometimes, its major.
sometimes i think
sometimes i don't.
sometimes, its just hard to explain why I did that.
sometimes....things ended up in a way you didnt expect it would be.
or anytime soon.

when humans grow, they tend to want more.
when we were young, we only want that much.
We were never satisfied.
In the end, we become greedy.
Things were never enough.
We are not as happy as we used to be.
Things can never be as simple.
As we tend to complicate matters.
So what are we going to do now?

My solution is..
Don't look back, jus move forward =D

3:43 AM

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Attend Miss Tiff’s wedding at The legends Fort canning outdoor wedding yesterday. Oh man, the place is very nice! Its a outdoor wedding and its like super windy. The wind keep blowing and hair is like damm messy. I sit beside a fan somemore. Imagine the whole night, my hair is blowing at one direction, haha. When the ceremony is about to start, i see a group of people coming in. When i see clearly, its actually the senior minister Mr Goh and his wife and a few body guard. I was stunned. I thought i am at some nationa day rally dinner. LOL! The food is so so only, not as nice as what i expected. But the ambience is good enough. When the ceremony starts, the bride and groom walked in. Wa, with the music, everything is like so touching. I tell zhenxiu that i got a sudden urge to get married man. HAA! The music, the performances is good too. Its the first time i attend a christian wedding ceremony. They will sing song first then pray then.....
Took only a few pictures. Enjoy!

5:12 AM

Monday, December 03, 2007

I hate the feeling when i wanted to sleep but i cant.

Will update on miss tiff's when i'm free. So many exams coming up.

BYE!

9:42 AM

Saturday, December 01, 2007

I feel so blissful now.
I have friends who stand by me and that's enough already.
What more can i ask for.

Shuhui and willie appear on my doorstep tonight again.
They pass me popiah and beancurd. Yum!
I am touched, really.
Willie is the one who suggest the visits today.
Thanks bro!
I will treasure this brother because this kind of friendship is hard to come by.
Shuhui, not forgetting you too. HAHA!
But really lah, i think they are evil.
Try to feed me so much food at this hour. LOL!
Last time is cakes and puffs, now is popiah and beancurd.
But nvm, I LIKE!
the most push back my jian fei ji hua only ma. HAHA!
HAHA. i tempted my sister and mother with the popiah.
and as predicted they couldn't resist the temption and share the popiah with me.
Sharing is fun!

My sister bought durian chocolates and other stuffs from KL.
the chocolate is nice! I ate two in two days =D
Die lah, these few days i ate alot of tibits. I'm going to take up more space already. HA!

Thanks friend!!

11:50 PM

HELLO DECEMBER!

Its finally dec already. Lets hope that its a good month ahead for everyone.
No more fighting, no more war. ok crap.

Its saturday and i have to stay at home.
I have to use today to brush up my IT2754 because labtest is on monday. I will not be doing together with my class but other class because i couldn't make it for the night class. If i fail this labtest, i'll be dead, very dead. So no matter what, i must pass. Wish me luck.
I have to go for the 2754 make up class on thursday morning.
Wednesday, thursday, friday all 8am. How nice :(
I'm going to turn over a new leaf by sleeping early. Really.
But dunno how long can i last only. HAHA
Wish me luck again.

Sian, i have written so much just and that stupid blogger didnt save my post. I have to retype and i have lose all the feel to reblog again. so its a short one. So, enjoy your weekends everyone. Loveyou.

BYEBYE NOVEMBER

2:32 PM