Filled with much thoughts.

Friday, November 30, 2007

haha. i thought i say i want to grow back my hair. So what did i did now, i went to cut my hair. i felt that my hair is very frizzy. Wanted to do something about it. Plus whenever i am feeling stress or things are troubling me, i will go and cut my hair. It helps me to release some stress. Its like cut away the woes and indeed, i felt lighter. It may not have a big difference but at least i feel the difference. But my face like even rounder. HAHA.

my waist and shoulder is hurting like hell man. shoulder is swollen. Was damm uncomfortable when i am doing the labtest today. I cant stay in a position for too long.

when i am on the bus home today, i was awaken by a couple. I heard the girl shouting at the boyfriend and asking him to shut up. But the boy still can smile and talk nicely at the girlfriend. But the girl still ask him to shut up. How rude. But i dun understand why the guy still can tolerate her. Maybe that the POWER OF LOVE. LOL!

Was out with shuhui today. Had a chat. We both agree on something. When a person was being hurt quite deeply before, they will tend to build a wall to protect themselves from getting hurt again. When they decided to open up, the scenario appear in their head and they find it quite difficult to overcome it. Maybe I did fall into that category. I'll need to take some time for me to think through when i am met with difficulties or problems. Once i find a reason, no matter how foolish it is to convince myself that everything is well, i will be fine again. But sometimes i do choose to run away and decide not to face it. Still, run away doesn't help because the problem will still remain there. So its just a matter of time and i wont let it affect me for too long. Because the world will not wait for me, life still have to move on. Its just how we can pull ourselves out and move with the society. Ha. Its jus a random thought.

ok lah, see you!

3:30 AM

Thursday, November 29, 2007

My buttock and shoulder hurt when i sit for too long. BECAUSE, i fell down in the bathroom last night. The floor is very slippery and i am very tired i did not concentrate while i'm wearing my clothes on. For a spilt second, i am sitting on my butt already. Super painful. I don't dare to move as i say my spine will break. Lucky i am naturally cushionise. Haha. The first thing on my mind when i fall is, will the person living below me felt shaking on the celling anot. I don't dare to call my brother because i'm afraid that he will laugh at me. Clumsy me.

I slept early last night, like around 1am. Wake up early this morning, die die also must wake my brother up for school. He always miss class jus because he coudn't wake up in the morning. So after he woke up, I went back to sleep. Then woke up in shock. I forgot my class also starts at 10am. So i faster bath and go to school. Was feeling rather energectic today. I was rather responisve. Good, shall keep up the good work.

Went hougang to meet kelly for the book and bought a new grandma shoe. I feel that the "ah ma" shoe is very comfortable. Wait till i got time then go for a shopping spree. I have not gone to a proper shopping for almost two months. I need to stock up my clothes, see until bored already. And a proper nice pumps too. Hougang central changed so much. I didnt go there for a long time already. Much more things to buy, eat and see. There's munchy donuts too!

ok, BYE!

2:38 AM

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I'M SO FREAKING TIRED CAN.

I need more sleep!
ok i have decided to use that two weeks break to recover my energy.
And i will be ENERGECTIC AGAIN!

7:05 AM

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

My sister have gone to KL with her school softball team this morning and will be going for 4 days. I'm missing her already. This younger sister of mine hardly leave home for so many days so i'm quite worried. Hope she have fun =)

Cramps all day long.
Excessive loss of blood already. LOL!
I need painkiller.

Woo, attend lsc and lawrence lecture today. Doze off every min. HAHA!
I turn and look at other class, all awake.
I turn and look at our class, half not here, half asleep, left a few playing games. HA!
That 3 hours, can die.
Like something is missing today, not used to it.

Manage to produce something for the tommy low project. Not alot but at least something.
Back home at 7. Starving!
Had yong tao fu with no noodle or rice today. But had two sushi. Heh Heh!
Ribbena still rock my world. But have even painful cramps after drinking.

Ate five ferrero rocher today. HAHA. I jus love to eat chocolate.
Dun need to offer me sweets because i dun like sweets. But one or two is fine. HAHA

ok bye.

8:23 PM

Monday, November 26, 2007

I think i'm too difficult to handle, too difficult to understand.
Even i don't understand myself.
So just forget it, dun try.
Just let everything come and go in the most natural way =)

I'm feeling rather stress already. Seems that i don't know my school work well enough.
Everything also dunno, how can. Not going to give up though.
Just that i don't know how long i can hang on.

I love you-know-who.
she came down with lots of tibits knowing that i am very sad and have to burn the midnight oil tonight. I simply love her to the max. how i wish i can hug her and give her a big kiss. LOVE YOU!
YOU REALLY MAKE MY DAY!

6:00 AM

Hell low all!

I'm here to update again, miss me? Heh Heh.

Met up with flora and freda on sat, went bugis to shop for presents. After that go for shiya 21st birthday party.

Went work today, cool!
Was super high today, cause you know why? HAHA
I have cleared some things on which have bothered me a little for quite some time.
SO, my mood is super good. Everyone around me will benefits :P
Because i will make the effort to make them as happy as me!

Woo, i am happy because i didnt think of it the whole damm day. And that "sickening" brother go and say the name infront of me, strigger abit but gone in a few mins. HAHA.
Ok. Today joe share with me something and i thinks that its quite funny. He said last time when he was in secondary school, then he saw this sentence on the desk and it made him laugh for almost one hour. there it goes,

有一种人的脸像大便，
因为大便像他的脸。
每当我大便的时候，
都会想起他的脸。

He said that some student wrote this to critise a teacher. HA!

When i told this to shuhui and millie at work, they say its not funny at all leh. They say when i intention to tell a joke, the joke will not turn out funny. When i don't intend to tell a joke, they thinks i'm funny. Wth. Haha. Make a little effort in my dressing today, kao everyone ask me where i intend to go after work. LOL. i normally wear sloppy to work BECAUSE i went to school before that. Dun like to wear differently if not ppl will say i AA (attract attention). I personally think i dun need this kind of attention, yeah. Its school, not going for fashion show right. Haha. But i also can be very girl one lor. Dun always call me brother leh. ok lah, only one does that. LOL!

ok, i think i shall do some research on the web design project if not i dunno how to die on wednesday. Ok BYEBYE!

12:28 AM

Sunday, November 25, 2007

OH YA OH YA!

when i reach home today, my mum told me that the flower pot outside my house have grown an individual long bean. WHAT!? LONG BEAN!

oh its actually one of the bean in a bag of beans that the priest gave it to us after my grandma's ritual. So cute lah, so i took 2 pictures of it. Let me share with all of you. Heh Heh!

8:49 AM

Friday, November 23, 2007

I WANT TO TRAVEL ALL OVER THE WORLD.

11:14 PM

Woohoo. I'm right here in my living room, surfing the net, eating my mee pok.
Its finally friday. Don't have to worry for test or assignment. I feel that i am really hardworking lor. LOL! I study for quiz recently. I still remember i say i want to depend on myself during test or quiz. Even if fail or pass, at least i will feel the 满足感.
Have been sleeping rather late these few days. Hmm, maybe 3 or 4am?
When i'm tired, i tend to stone.
i stone = surrounding is air. I cant seems to find my friend in the crowd. Even though she is standing infront of me, waving. ha!

I happen to come across this video when i am surfing aimlessly in youtube (which i always do) Damm cool lah, wonder how the person does it.

偶像!!
HAHA

2:12 PM

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Another random post.

was watching the 9 o'clock show on channel 8. In the show, there is a guy called haiming. He got a sister and a friend. Then the friend is the sister best friend. Then this haiming likes the childhood friend. He dun dare to say. So through out these years, he stay by her side to protect and take care of her. Then there was one day, the girl got some trouble. As usual, haiming tried to solve her problem without letting her knowing it. The sister wanted to call the police, the brother declined, he want to solve it in his own way. Then the sister very angry. He told the brother:" Nowadays, if you like a person you must tell her. You never say how you expect her to know. Why so stupid do all these things and she dun even know a thing!" So my conclusion is, if you like a person and you dun say, really very stupid meh? yah, you may just lose a chance like this, but you have to overcome that barrier is not easy. So i still think it depends on the individual.

your happiness lies in your own hands.
Take it or lose it.
So, JIA YOU EVERYONE!

yah, very very random.

5:33 AM

I MISS YOU,
EVERYDAY.

HAHA!

4:18 AM

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

felt so hungry the whole day in school, gastric starts to ache. had creamy chicken pasta and tomato soup for lunch. as i am overly hungry, i end up feeling very uncomfortable after i eat. Was feeling bloated when i was working, so i had an ice cream, dragonfruit and rock melon for dinner. haha. very tired today, going to sleep now. BYEBYE!

6:58 AM

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

hey Hey!

i didnt know what to blog. Did nothing much these few days.
No contents = No updates.

But time really pass very fast. Cause i just realise that we have started school for 1 month 2 weeks already. Woo! I think i will miss my classmate when go our own path next year. Hmmm.

I have to go finish up tommy low assignment already. BYEBYE!

7:00 AM

Monday, November 19, 2007

thanks for the two "ren bao la zhu".
tasty, HEE!

12:43 AM

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Change new skin.
Too girly already. Searching for even ideal blogskin.
So meanwhile, lets bare with this first.

Looking back, wow!
I have blogged one year and 2 months.
Good Job, Huishan!

Throughout these months, i have blogged about the happiest and the saddest experiences.
Although its may not be very private stuff of mine. But it contains most of my semi private stuff.
ok cool.

going out now. BYEBYE!

2:53 PM

Catch game plan at suntec today with friends.
It was a great show!
I LIKE.

Planning to watch more movies. Like Enchanted, Star Dust, Alvin and the chipmucks etc.. Support good movies!
So anyone who wants to watch these movies can ask me. Heh Heh!

I doll up myself today. Its saturday man! I discover that i don't bother to doll up myself for a long time. Its always those sloppy clothes. So today i wore my black wedge/heel. It was a big mistake. I didnt know we will be walking so much today. Big brother park at shaw tower. So from shaw tower to suntec, from suntec back to shaw tower for dinner, then from shaw tower to esplanade. From esplanade back to shaw tower. Climb so many stairs. Omg can. My leg is so sore now, even walking with my bare foot. One year there's 365 days, i wore flats from 360 days. I can even count the number of times when i wear heel with my finger. Forget about the heels, i'm back at home comfortably already.

Had vegetarian food for dinner. It was nice!
I had ham fried rice with the others had black pepper udon and prawn and watermelon fried rice. We had fries and cuttle fish balls as sides. its all made by flour.

I think i'm sure of what i want.
But i don't see any chance.
Big Bro ask me to change for your sake.
I do want to change, and changing, for my own good.
Not for anyone.
If i change for anyone, then it will be pointless for me.
I would rather you like me for who i am, not how good i look.
But i know its impossible, cause hardly anyone will not judge by appearance.
That's the harsh reality of the truth.

7:41 AM

Friday, November 16, 2007

got a sudden urge to eat sashimi.
not tmr, but NOW!

Heh Heh!

3.21am
i'm alone in my room and i'm SCARED. my sister went for prom and didnt come back tonight and my brother is playing pool outside. Leaving me alone in the room! Heard some noise outside the window just now and some noise in my living room, Oh man, save me!

9:38 AM

[[一起长大的约定
那样真心
与你聊不完的曾经
而我已经分不清
你是友情还是错过的爱情]]

-jay.chou-

its 2.16am and i cant sleep. so i decided to come online. I find that i will blog something whenever i am bored. So don't be surprise if i blog alot of times in a day. More to come!!

I wanted to watch a mv of this song but i found these in the end. Omg piano version. NICE!

周杰伦 Jay Chou - 蒲公英的约定

i think i will melt if someone play piano for me lah.

Its time to wake up, huishan. Heh heh.

6:18 AM

Flu bug is back!

Oh man, i'm down with heavy flu and cough. What i eat, i get stomachache. That's the worst part. Make me breatheless and fainting whenever i make any movement. It get even bad when i wake up every morning. My nose is just like a water tap flowing non-stop. Argh, i hate this feeling.

This afternoon went to temasek poly to find kelly. I need her to teach me some web design thing. I suck in that module or i can say i suck in every module. But i woke up late. suppose to wake up at 9. yes, i wake up at 9 to wake my brother up for school. If i don't force him to wake up. I think he is going to get expel from school soon. Really worried for him, still need me and my parents to worry. After i wake him up, my nose get really bad. So i decide to go back to sleep a while more. When i woke up, its already 11.30. Oh gosh! So i faster bath and go out. The journey from my house to TP is freaking far lah. I took 1 and a half hour to reach. Almost died in the bus. As usual, my nose is still giving me problem.

Finally reached and met kelly and huimin. Went to design school to eat chicken chop. HAHA! They say the chicken chop there very nice but i feel so so only. I prefer kelly's chicken cullet. Heh Heh. Maybe the chicken is tastier on the other side. After lunch, we went to the library to do some serious work. But the internet connections is giving us problem again. took almost an hour to get connected to the TP server, with the help of kelly's friend lynette. Went home around 5pm. Today TP have super alot of people. Walk also difficult. But i find that TP students are much more livelier than NYP students. And their events got so many ppl participate. Not like ours. HAHA!

Went amk hub for dinner. Ate Mac, omg i feel so sinful can. Must run more once i get myself cure. But i really dun like eating medicine. So for the past one month, i just try to let my body cure my cough and flu naturally. Hmm. Hope it can.

I am very tired now. But i still have tons of assignment not done yet. Off to do now, BYEBYE!

5:18 AM

Thursday, November 15, 2007

I super despise husband who beat up their wife whenever they like.

They just suck to the core.

anyway....

watch this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOqXlbWf9Io

the students who wrote those comments are damm funny lah.

9:35 PM

one word; bored.

i still remember i have drawn a face like this. then i find it super cute. ok lah, at least to me can. So today while chatting with huimin, very bored. LOL. so i come up with a series of faces. WOO! i like it so much. cute can. Maybe not to you but i like can already. I even thought of replacing the "miss cute", "mr handsome" tee. LOL. i shall print this picture on different color t-shirt and sell it. What a good idea. High 5 to me!

i have even set it as my wallpaper.

alibaba is my papa..

HAHA

for huimin:

ok, dun take it too seriously. Its meant to be a joke can. If you have fainted by now, please press 2 for assistance, press 3 for enquiries, press 4 for customer service, press 5 for upgrade services, press 6 for surveys,

press 100 for booking of ambulance.

and lastly press 1 for ME!!

I'll be there waiting for you. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

and i guess you would rather die than press 1 right. never mind.

lol

4:24 AM

never do exercise when your food haven't digest completely.

because...............

I FEEL LIKE VOMITING NOW.

GrEaT.

2:17 AM

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Caution: Long long post

Thinking back, it may not be a bad thing to fail my O'lvl that year. I recieve more than i lose. What can i say? Hmm. Maybe the best line to describe is " Things happen for a reason."

Today i recieve a msg from miss tiffany(my ex-private school teacher). She is getting married!!!
And she invited me and xiu to her wedding which is on 3 dec. Seriously, i feel happy for her. They have dated for so long, its time to get married lah. HAHA.

This teacher reminds of the days when i was in city harvest educational centre. A place where i go after i got to know my results. A place which give me hopes again. I know this school from xiu's brother friend and decided that i should go for this school. For just one reason; to prepare for my next O'lvl. Before i could enter this school, i have to go for an interview first. I still remember i went with xiu. We both entered the unfamiliar place seeing so many unfamiliar faces. We were damm nervous. Its finally my turn for the interview and i am damm nervous. But the moment i step in, i forgot my nervousness. The teachers welcome me with a big smile on their face.

There was a orentation one week before the school starts. We were being introduced to all the teachers in the school. Before that, i thought the teachers there were all aunties and uncles, Even the principal too. But when i saw all the teachers and the principals, i was abit stunned. The teachers were all in their early 20s. Even the prinicpal is in his early 30s. And they are so hip can. They are totally different from what we see in school. They behave just like your friends even like a fashion idol. Can you imagine the principal is a dancer? He co dance in he yao sun mv before. So happening lah. The school deco is very modern. Everything is just great! You wont even feel stress when you could not answer a question cause you noe the teachers will be always there for you.

Apart from that, I have also learn alot of things from them. We have the annual school camp. They brought us to a adventure camp called nacli. We were very much bonded when we were there. The camp brought each and very one of us closer. And the camp had boost my confidence. The things that i don't dare to do, i do it during the camp. For examples, crossing
those obstacles. I thought i couldn't do it, but the encouragement from the peers made me feel i can. The staffs appreciated each and very one of us.

We did not go to school, pay a large sum of school fees, slack, learn nothing and go home. We have alot of meaningful activities going on. We have cca, community services and many many more. Most importantly, the school fees were not expensive and we could pay by installments. We were expose to alot of opptunities. There was once when our school had our grand opening, we have invited the minister ( i forgot which one) but its quite a big shot. We were assign to some post. I remember me and xiu were the ushers. we need to show them around and tell them the history and the meaning of each classroom and stuffs. Its was so fun!

There's also once when we invite the orphans from different orphanage to our school. I forgot why we invite them. But i still remember we brought them to watch a play at one place beside or at raffles hotel. We bought mcdonalds for them and wore those clown red nose on our own nose to entertain them. You cant imagine how happy they were. We were very happy too.

And ya, we have our very own prom night. Guess where does it is held at?

We held the prom on a yatch. Those big yatch. As usual, I was one of the organiser. We plan the events with our teachers and the principal. Go early to the yatch to decorate before the actual event starts. Its was the most memorable prom i ever go to. The wind was so big, the yatch was swaying but it didnt affect our mood. We enjoy ourselves totally.

Time just passed so quickly. It had been two years since i graduate from CHEC and went on to poly. But those days were the happiest of my study life. I totally didnt regret it. I have taken alot of good memories back with me. I couldn't remember the bad ones as there were too little for me to remember.

I just love that entire community.
Until now, i will still go back to visit the teachers with xiu during special ocassions. I guess i will never forget all of them.

And oh ya. I didnt get in for the chiangmai, sabai sabai project. Quite disappointed about it. They only take in 18 people out of 100 applications. Hmm, maybe i am not good enough. Sign up for this project thinking if i can get in, I will get to experience life and leave some memories for myself. Because i really feel no sense of belonging. I really do hope i can accomplish something when i am still studying in poly. Not used to not joining any activites when i am in school.

Well, i will still sign up for the vietnam and cambodia project. Try my luck again. HAHA.

ok. I think i really can drift topics quite well. haha!
check out this cool school : city havest education centre

can you spot me? HAHA!

reception

science lab

(place where we do cool experiment that wasn't allow in normal government sch)

classroom

cafe ( cool right, at least better than nyp. LOL)

Dance room

maybe they can consider letting me be their ambassador. HAHA!

7:51 AM

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

hi everyone, how are you?

hmm. have been thinking which kind of spectacle should i change to. I'm not suitable for contact lens as my eyes are super sensitive and dry. Plus my panda eyes, cannot imagine. Later the zoo keeper come and catch me. There are a various of colors i have in mind:

- red
- yellow
- white

really dunno which one should i pick. must try out. But i'm so sick of wearing spec already. Maybe i should trying putting on my contact lens and see if it hurt my eyes again anot. hmm.

one week of e learning, and i feel so bored. assignments alot. and i am so lazy.

arghh!

3:40 PM

its 1am.

yah, just came back from changi beach and jalan kayu. My beloved big brother decided to bring us there tonight. So sweet of him. We jus sat by on a bench by the beach to talk. Then after awhile, "da sao" wanted to play swing and so we went to play. Its was so fun! It has been ages since i sit on a swing. Brings back alot of childhood memories. Still remember there was one day when i was swinging happily on a swing at one of the playground near my house, a boy say he wan to challenge. Ok fine, we compete and you know what, he swing too vigorous and the swing jus turn 360 degree and he fall flat on the ground. Power right. I was laughing my head off when he just ran away crying. See how bad i was. Heh Heh.

After swinging, we went to play on the see saw. haha! I love it. Had great fun there. "Dao sao" cant reach home late today. So after awhile, we went to jalan kayu for prata. I had cheese prata and it taste great. Hmmm, will visit the place again when i got the chance. Went home after eating.

Its jus feel good to have a big brother. At least i am not the eldest anymore. Sometimes i just feel so tired of being the eldest in the house. I will need someone to take care of me sometimes though.

Yeah, jus finish one assignment and i am going to do the next one now. Must finish up as fast as i could so i could enjoy my weekends before the school starts again. cheers!

8:50 AM

Sunday, November 11, 2007

work yesterday.
work today.

saw that guy at work today.
the one joan and felicia say looks like my new urban guy.
they say until he look very handsome or what. when i saw today, my jaw drop.
so are you all wondering he really looks as good as what they mention.
the answer is NO!
LOL.
Its quite disappointing. Not as good looking as what they describe leh, aiyah.

both of my bosses came down to shop yesterday. the moment they came, crowds started to come in. like that cham, cause they wont believe me already, cause morning was really quiet but why they come so busy lei.
i think they shouldn't be there. Keep commenting on what i do. Then i serve customer, she fight to serve then ask me to keep the clothes, then when i am keep the clothes she ask me to go and serve the customer. When i serve again, she snatch them away. Wth. I key the code also want to comment. She not clear herself yet she wan me to do it her way. Make everyone so confused. What to do, who ask me to work under her. And she came down again today. Every thing is jus so messed up with her around.
forget about work. its jus all craps.

went out after work with my "brother" jimmy and "sister" millie and shuhui.
Initially jimmy suggested to go party world at bishan as millie feel like singing. But its closed when we reach there. So we went amk k box.
My ou xiang can really sing lor. so memerizing can.
we sing till 3am. and jimmy send me and shuhui home. cause jimmy and millie are sibling, so they go home together.
in case you all are wondering, millie and jimmy are sibling and they own a shop there. They are 30 plus adult :)
reach home around 4am. bathed and wanted to catch some sleep before i go to work in the morning. But, my stupid nose jus couldn't cooperate with me. It give me hell. It drag till 6am when i could finally fall asleep. Then, i have some weird dream and cause me to be late for work. I couldn't say the dream here cause you would definitely laugh your head off.
drag my feet to work today. and my nose is giving me big time problem. Plus the shop is full of dust with those clothes around, I was in living hell. Anyway my life is sucky enough, it wouldn't cause a difference anyway.
what's worst is, i woke up with a swollen eyes. I rub my eyes too hard last night when i have irritating nose. The area under the eyes is abit wounded. Ouch, pain can.
And i really dunno what i have eaten, my face is covered with some rashes. I think its the dust. I touched them and i touch my face. Help ar, not enough sleep, not enough nutrients and no clear skins. ARGH!

finally i'm back at home and i have one week of self directed learning which i dun have to go to school. Happy can. but its like i'm buried with lots of assignment. Damm.

My days hasn't been smooth this year. Hope 2007 can just pass soon and i will welcome year 2008 with an open arms.

life is jus so boring.

8:00 AM

Friday, November 09, 2007

i do care about how each of my friend felt.
but in a different ways.
that's all i can say.

9:36 AM

Thursday, November 08, 2007

I'm so bored, boreD, borED, boRED, bORED, BORED!!
.
.
http://www.wretch.cc/blog/tony1970&article_id=10591077

2:17 AM

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

8th November 2007

I'M OFFICIALLY SICK

i wish i have a box of ferrero rocher with me

11:10 PM

Self confession

I was feeling really worst this whole morning. i keep asking why i am like this. but i really dunno. one thing i can confirm is, its not bgr definitely. Feeling so terrible that i almost cried out a few time. So lost in everything. So right after school, i went home.

when to work around 3. its was a tiring journey. i keep sleeping on the bus. Guess these few days didnt get a good rest. But when i reach work, i am feeling ok. I could even joke and laugh. Everything seems alright. Shuhui came over and find me for awhile as she is helping a friend to look after her shop. So after work, millie shuhui and willie(my new aknowledge brother) went out. Willie drove us out to kenridge park i think. I forgot the name already but at that side, we can see night scenery. After a while, we left and sent millie home first as she is tired already. We arrived at shuhui void deck and chat for a while. both shuhui and willie is tired.

Shuhui the potential future nurse say that maybe its because of the hormones pill that i'm taking now affects my mood causing me to have serious mood swings. Yes, its one of the side effects. other side effect will be nausea, headache, weight gain. the pill i took last time didnt cause such a big effect but dunno why this time its like this. but no choice, i have to take it. for my own good. but the pill is treating and harming my health at the same time. I really feel a serious mood swing of myself. I think my ms should stop, and i think i'm affecting ppl too. Jus hope that my body can adjust to the new medication soon.

you can continue to scroll down if you are interested to noe more about me:

I am strong on the outside but very fragile on the inside.
I thought i am very brave, but actually i'm not. I may freak out anytime.
The harder i am on the outside, the brittle i am on the inside.
I can be smiling while i am crying.
I put on a brave front in front of my friends to let them feel that i am not that weak.
I am afraid of insects to the extend that if you put me in a room full of insects, i may kill myself.
I cry easily. no matter i am happy or sad.
Once i start crying, i find it hard to stop, even i wan to.
I only shop when i got the money.
I go shopping only when i noe i need that particular things.
I'm afraid of rejection.
When i look at you, i hope you will smile back. I will.
I hate to be hate.
I like to sing.
I like to sleep but i find sleeping a waste of time
I stone easily.
I like to be alone some times.
I dun like window shopping.
I will buy the things i like without comparing prices.
I dun like to eat sweet, serious.
I like chocolate to bits.
I dislike too spicy food.
I am the kind who need highly sense of security.
I have no confident in myself.
I dun like to talk.
I love to travel
I want to go western countries.
I dun like to eat papaya.
I like to eat chinese medicine
I hate climbing stairs.
I like to stay at home
But when i stay at home, i want to go out
When i go out, i dunno what to do and feel like going home again.
I wanted to a kindergarden teacher.
I have a mentally disabled aunty.
I want to drive.
I dun like to take train.
I like to take long journey bus.
When i got the sudden urge to do something, i wan to do straight away.
I do not have much patience.
I do not like to blog about what i do. Its tiring to repeat what you have done.
I like to draw. but i suck at it.
I have won first price at the mcdonalds coloring contest when i am young.
I think i have i have high ego.
I dun like to wear t-shirt.
I dun wear skirt anymore.
I like to wear cap but i dun look good in it.
I love my family alot.
My ambition is to get married and give birth. (used to)
I dun like crowd.
I will tend to look not interested when i am nervous infront of the person i like.
I need assurance.
I need sense of security.
I always hide my feelings.
I dun like ppl to force me.
I am a sensitive person.
I sincerely wan to be your good friend.
I like to drive around during night time.
I dun like to club.

etc... theres too much of it already.
very tired. its 3.12am now. i got to sleep already.

HAPPY DEEPAVALLI everyone!

10:33 AM

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

skip ERP lecture as i have no mood to listen to any thing. wanted to skip lsc class too but they say he giving some speech. so i stayed. after that, byebye. so when i reach the bus stop to take bus home, i decided to pay my father shop a visit. since the fire, i still have not seen how it look like. thus, i took a cab down. when i reach there, i am so impressed. He actually built a shop on his own, incredible. those cupboard and rack also built by himself. I think my father can be a carpenter if he don't own a shop. Haa. After he close his shop, i follow him to deliver coffee powder to his customer. It jus like a excursion between father and daughter. Nice.

I took a lot of photos today. Because i have to wait downstair while my father go up to the customers house. And i saw a funny thing hanging on the windscreen. Its chilli, so cute!!! haha. and i saw a pretty dog at one of the house. When we reach the door, the dog jus ran over. Jus like wanted to eat us up like that. After visiting all the house, we went home. Now i'm so tired. Feel like sleeping already.

Don't know what is happening to me recently. Jus only some random thoughts that make me so restless in doing anything. I seriously dun enjoy going to school anymore. Somehow, i dun feel a sense of belonging there. Its like so individual you see. Everyday go to school, finish school, go home, if not go out. Life is dry. Don't have mood for lesson, dun have mood for fun. i even got a urge to quit school. now you noe how torturing i felt. i feel that something is making me so confused. Hmm, maybe not jus one. Always go out till late, at least there someone to talk and accompany me. I hate to be alone, cause i will start thinking about it. And i hate it, totally. Hope this horrible feeling jus end quickly.

the small baby chilli

the pretty dog
me in the car

you can see how tired i am from this picture. i look like zombie, totally.
My father temporary self-made shop
my dad and my relative

can you imagine he build this cupboard with his own hands?

and he build this shop all by himself

i am just so proud of my father. Love him.

3:01 AM

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Let me introduce to you my new friend, joan. I know her at my workplace. We will always gather outside my shop to talk or gossip whenever we are free. Haha. That day we happen to wear the same combination of the top. When we saw each other, we gave a big laugh. So we decided to take a picture.

some random photo took during class.

i think i look super old. Maybe its time for me to do some facial.

8:42 AM

THE EMOTION IN ME.

7:56 AM